Country
Roads…Take Me Home
For those of you not familiar with Maine, you can crisscross the state on
numerous country back roads, roads that seem to go from nowhere to nowhere.
Sure we have the major highways, at least running north and south. But to
experience the true character of Maine one only needs to spend a bit of time
touring places like T 16 R14 or Square Lake (T16 R5) to get the real flavor of
Maine. I'm not talking about the sweet taste of a freshly cooked lobster or
clams direct from the ocean. I am talking about what you do when you are lost
and have no idea where in the world you are or how to get home.
Now before you all suggest that I type my location into my cell phone, I need
to remind you that there are still many areas in the back woods of Maine void
of cell service and besides, it only works if I remembered to take it off the
dining room table and bring it along. And what is that new expression.....'out
of cell out of mind!'
It started out as a beautiful ride on this cool Fall morning. The colorful
foliage provided a fantastic contrast to the blue sky and puffy white clouds. A
few left turns here and then a couple to the right and I was deep into the
Maine woods. As it got closer to lunch time, I decided it was time to head
back, but which way was back.
Here are a couple of facts to remember. There are very few street or road signs
in most of the Maine woods. Keeps the state budget down. There are very few
houses and not much other traffic. And most important, regardless of which way
you turn, everything looks the same...trees, trees, and more trees.
After driving for a few more miles in what seemed like circles, I was surprised
to come upon a very small general store. The sign in the window said 'General
Store' for all your local shopping needs.
Several men stood by the counter, drinking coffee and discussing the local
politics and of course, the weather. The lady behind the counter was
rearranging the boxes of shotgun shells and neatly folded blaze orange hunting
vests. The vests appeared to be the 'one size fits all' model.
I wanted to act 'cool' and not seem like someone from away so after pouring
myself a cup of coffee and grabbing a Ring Ding off the shelf I casually
said....
“I spent
a bit too much time taking in the beautiful scenery and I am running a bit
late. Can you guys give me directions for the quickest way back to the
interstate?” I think the word that gave it away was ' interstate.' They knew I
was not a local.
The first to reply simply responded by saying...” turn around and go back the
way you came.” That was easier said than done and I confessed I had not really
been paying attention.
The second offered more detail. “Take a left out of the parking lot. Go about
three miles to the big oak tree on the corner of the 'ole Warren place. Take
the next right. If you pass the dead deah (that's deer for those of you from
away) carcass on the side of the road, you've go too far. Turn around and take
the next left. Follow that road to the next 'fillin' station.
At this point the lady behind the counter asked...” Which way ya headin' on the
interstate, north or south? There is an easier way to get there 'pending on
which way you're going.
“South'” was my response.
“Figures,” was her's. “Could tell just by the brand-new boots on your feet.
L.L.Bean ?”
For the next few minutes the three argued as to the best route to send me so I
could get to where I was heading.
The final directions included a turn at the local sand shed, keeping to the
right at the twin forks, staying to the left of the old log cabin and keeping
an eye out for the horse barn surrounded by the white fence. “When you get
there, you're getting close.
“Need a box of shells?” she asked.
“Nope. Not this trip.” Like I could find my way back there!
I “thanked” them for their help, paid for another Ring Ding and started out on
the journey. Much to my surprise, within an hour or so I was back on the
interstate and heading for home.
With the advent of the 'Garmin' and the cell phones, provided you are within reach
of a signal, the need to be able to ask and be given directions is quickly
becoming a dying art, especially if the directions include a bit of the local
flavor, whether it be a bit of “down-east' or southern Aroostook county humor.
And as I got into my car, I could hear the three of them laughing. “He probably
has never held a shotgun and doesn't even know what a box of shells is used
for!!”
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