Do these jeans make my butt look big?

 I have decided that if, for some strange reason, every pair of jeans in the country and the world were to disappear, there would be 'a lot' of people walking around “butt naked.” I came to this conclusion as I sat in the parking lot at the local grocery store, motor running to keep warm,  waiting for my wife as she pick up a couple of items for dinner  (like all the other retired folks).

   It was late afternoon, bitterly cold and the store was very busy as people rushed home from work. As I watched them race in and out of the store ( it was cold!) I realized that almost all were wearing some form or degree of 'jeans.' Many pairs were old and tattered. Some were new. Christmas gifts I might assume. Even gentlemen with shirts and ties were wearing 'jeans'. No black or gray slacks here. But the sneakers??? Not sure about that!

   The story goes that the term 'jeans' comes from the word 'Genoa' and referred to a cloth that came from Italy. Originality it was used to make pants for sailors, being a thick blend of linen and wool. The problem with linen was that it needed to be pressed in order to look neat. And you know the Navy.

   Years later jeans were being produced in England and were made primarily of wool. And the year? It was the 1700's. Later, a new fabric was introduced, denim, and the rest is history.

   By the late 19^th century America got into the 'jeans' business and the most well-know maker was a gentleman by the name of Levi Strauss. Along with Jacob Davis they would change the industry forever. (It was Davis' invention of the metal rivets to keep the pockets from ripping  off.)

 ' Jeans' hit the beginning of their everlasting popularity by the 1950's . New companies emerged on the scene and as usual, the movie industry played a major role in their success as the "rebels" on the big screen all wore jeans as a statement of "rebellion."  James Dean ring a bell?

   I can remember my fist pair of 'jeans'; dark denim blue and stiff as a board. But I could only wear them around the house, never in public, according to my mother and definitely not to school.

   'Jeans' were made for the 60's and 70's and the hippy movement. They were to become the symbol of individuality and an independent spirit as they took on new shapes and designs.  And by 1970, the dark blue had given way to the new look of “washed-out” and 'well worn'. Bet you can still find pairs of  'jeans' buried at Woodstock.

   From the early 1980's to the present day, 'jeans have continued to expand their roll into high fashion and design. There are very few who do not have at least one pair of jeans as a major part of the wardrobe whether they be designer or regular, distressed or destroyed, ultra low or pencil thin.

   I have several pairs of 'jeans', now that I am retired. I have a “dress pair” to wear with a nice shirt and sport coat, several pair that I wear when working around the house and mowing the lawn, one pair with the mandatory tears and worn out knee and one pair spotted with paint. ( I personally like the shirt, sport coat and 'jean' look with boat mocs.)

   The future of “jeans” looks sound and secure, regardless of "how big your butt is." And besides, if 'jeans' were, to all of a sudden to disappear from the face of the earth, I am not sure how pretty a sight  would be!! Could give  new meaning to the term " ugly butt naked!"